What makes a great tip? That’s the million-dollar question at LifeTips. To help demystify the secret of a fabulous, “oh my God I never knew this” tip, the editorial staff enlisted the help of Christopher Walken and the cowbell skit on Saturday Night Live.

In the sagacious words of Mr. Walken: “I gotta have more cowbell, baby!”

C: Clear, Concise, Compelling. Cut the fat and give us a juicy piece of meat (or tofu, if you’re vegetarian like me). We want bite-sized tips that deserve every second we spend sinking our teeth into them.

O: Optimized. You have your list of keywords, so make sure you use them naturally and buffer them with additional keywords.

W: Witty. Funny is good—we like to laugh. Wit is a fine craft, and if you use it skillfully your readers will ♥ you.

B: Bona fide. Original, authentic, FRESH. Give us something we’ve never seen before.

E: Educational. Enlighten us. We think we’re really smart, so bring us to our knees—humble us. Make us not worthy.

L: Language. Our job is easier when you use correct grammar, punctuation, and mechanics. We have standards people!

L: LifeTips. LifeTips has a fever, and the only prescription is more C.O.W.B.E.L.L.!